Johnny Depp is even planning to change his name to Jack Sparrow.
Florida, USA. In a move that
caught his fans off-guard, Johnny Depp has indicated that he will act only in ‘Pirates
of the Caribbean’ sequels for the rest of his life.
It may have something to do with the
global superstar’s latest venture Transcendence tanking
horribly at the box office, following similar fates for The Lone Ranger, Dark
Shadows, and The Rum Diaries. One rarely gets to see these many
flops in a row unless an episode of ‘Poker Stars’ is on TV.
Johnny Depp is even planning to change
his name to Jack Sparrow.
To be fair (and in Depp’s defense), no
one has made more money or fame as a pirate since the founder of BitTorrents
back in the late 90s.
The actor made the dramatic
announcement during an appearance on David Letterman. This was quite
appropriate since Dave knows a thing or two about identifying a mediocre
template for a show that sort of works and sticking to it doggedly for 30
years.
Compared to the first edition, the
sequels have been steadily decreasing in quality but have somehow made money
and kept people interested. Much like the Windows operating system or scions of
the Gandhi family.
Walt Disney Pictures, which distributes
the Pirates franchise, was suitably delighted. A statement from the studio read
– “We are glad to see Johnny come to his senses and leave creativity and
experimentation to other actors with talent. The truth is – he is a one hit
wonder like M Night Shyamalan with The Sixth Sense or Jesus with The
Bible.”
The studio also added this worrying
note – “We will happily churn out an endless stream of ‘Pirates’ movies
till the end of time or there is peace in the Middle East, whichever comes
first.”
Accordingly, the 5th edition of the
series “Pirates of the Caribbean: You Will Hate Yourself but Will Still Come
and Watch it Anyway” is expected to hit theaters in the summer of 2015.
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